Oftentimes in my life, I have found myself in a position where I don't have the vocabulary to fully express how I feel about something. In those moments, when my mastery of language fails, I turn to that medium that I have dedicated myself to: Music.
Music, to me, is that one remaining bastion of pure truth in a world of deceitfulness and corruption. It is the outlet of expression for the soul that bypasses our ability to cognitively recognize and communicate what it is we feel. It's almost as if empathy flows forth, as does compassion, sorrow, anger, whatever it is I need to express to the world around me comes out in the subtleties and finesse of performance. It's so cathartic, in fact, that many times I forget when there actually is an audience. It becomes a matter of connecting to God and allowing that force to speak through me for a time, it truly is the highest spiritual experience I've been able to attain. How wonderful is this gift I've been given, that not only am I able to express what I feel, but I'm also able to go back to the composers that have left behind those inscriptions of what they felt at a time, or their world condition, and filter that through the lens of my perception and experience and make it relevant again! In what other way can we be so connected to our past, our lineage, the great achievements of history, than to know that the pitches and rhythms I produce are the same that were brought forth into being tens, if not hundreds of years ago, and were heard by the people of that generation.
It is communication at its paramount, the material through which people can connect, all over the world, and savor their emotions knowing that they are understood, and are not alone. What greater thing could you offer a man in his time of sorrow than to play a song that shows exactly how he feels? You couldn't accomplish that with words in a hundred years. Words are clumsy, they have multiple meanings, they can be misunderstood, they can be twisted, taken out of context, but most prevalent is that they can fail to truly express what we wish them to express. That is not true of music, and it is the reason why when I have something that is of utmost importance to me to communicate to someone else, I use it before I speak, and they understand.
It is the white light in my world, that unadulterated truth to which I have devoted my life to the understanding of, and sharing with the world. As I learn more, and experience more, and sink deeper into it's warmth, I become closer to what I feel is the ultimate in the human experience.
What is the fire that burns, but does not consume?
It is truth.
And I speak my truth through music.
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