I spent a great deal of time trying to make this most intangible of emotions fit my usual style of prose, but after about eight hours worth of work, I decided that the best direction to choose is one of poetry.
From the beginning, men were made to be partnered
Yet such things have come forth, that they might stand in the way
Regardless of effort, no care for time, they will alter
Those things we love best, and leave us out in the rain
As people, we try to stand up and take what is given
But those who might give are often hurried away
And if you offer all, your life, love, and oaths of commitment
You will quickly find, just one will accept and stay
Approach with caution, now, and in your heart: forgiveness
Take control of your life, and save those gifts for your truth
Life is harsh, yes child, it can be so
But don't allow those clouds of resentment to bar your way
Come in with a fresh heart, door wide open to all
Remember that the pain slips in, but it's oh so worth the cost
When you find that place, as many a man has before you
Hold on with your life, and bear no quarrel between
The sacrifice of the self for the love of your other is sacred
And if they respond in kind, light will shine through
I've had my trials, yes, I've certainly been there
Had my face in the coals, my feet hung over the flames
You must go forth now, and take with you this wisdom
That within your self, peace must prosper and grow
Only then can you share joy with others
When your sanctum of soul is free from all of the dust
Fear no man, take your life in your hands, and walk swiftly
But not so quick that you miss the journey along the way
You follow the paths of many that walked here before you
Lose no hope, for they will show you the way
Claim your love, it's yours, and divinely presented
And pray that your partner will not long be astray
Tempests of passion, storms of indignation
Fits of rage, none can stand to compare
This feeling within, the state of mind of contentment
Though when it's lost, often one falls to despair
If your love seems lost, and no hope is found, join with me, here
And hand in hand, you and I will find our way
Do you dare to dream, your fantasies and desires
Will they guide your path, or somehow lead you away
If you choose your life to be lived here, right in this moment
Take the love that you have, and savor it for today
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Sacrifice vs. Compromise
I'm sure the cliche 'nice guys finish last' is well known, but most people don't give it enough thought to determine the true meaning behind the phrase. This is a lesson that is applicable in every facet of one's life, but most notably in relationships.
The kinder you are, the more likely you are to be stepped on.
Now, that doesn't mean I advocate being an asshole. In fact, it's quite the opposite. While that statement is certainly true, the fact of the matter is that those people are often abused so that the offending party can give themselves a quick leg-up in a situation. In the long term, karmically, those kinder people will often grow into stronger individuals, and be led to more successful paths in their lives.
What does this mean to you? First is the fact that yes, you should be a 'nice' person, but in doing so you are guaranteed to open yourself up to hardships and pain that you otherwise would not experience. The other side of that coin, however, is that in so doing, you will reach heights that you would otherwise not. Second, you must not begrudge those people who do harm you on your path. It is rarely your place to deliver recompense for wrongdoing against you, and the most fruitful course of action to take is to allow it as little power of influence over your life as possible. Sure, at some points, you are going to be hurt by people you genuinely care about; but, don't allow that to cloud your vision as to the true nature of your behavior. Your identity, and more importantly the essence that formed that identity, is not a thing that you should allow to shift with the tides of your environment. You can choose to be malleable, true, and at certain stages of your life change will indeed be necessary, but the key is to make it deliberate change that you've decided will be for the betterment of your life. Don't indulge vengeful thoughts, especially against those people you would have at one time called most dear to your heart; because if you do, you are validating their behavior toward you. If you instead continue on the path you've chosen to be your personal truth, and disallow those outside influences to affect your pace on said course, then the burden of guilt falls on your attacker.
Finally, to address the actual title of the article. Kind people most often tend to take it upon themselves to sacrifice something of their own for other peoples happiness. The alternative would be for both parties to reach a compromise on whatever the issue may be. The reason this happens is due to the imbalance of effort in these interpersonal relations. The typical development will end up with one party trying to hold up a relationship on their own, while the scale tips and the opposing party reaps all the immediate rewards of the first's benevolence. This chain of events inevitably leads to the aforementioned abuse, but now we can see why the kinder party emerges ahead. While that effort, within the context of that singular relationship, can often seem for naught; on the whole, when one considers personal development, it builds them to allow even greater effort to be put forth in more egalitarian environments. If those people do indeed not allow themselves to be set off course by those transpired events that seem at first to be failures, they will continue on with more fervent pace, and a certain heart.
Be strong in your actions, resolute in your decisions, and stoic against those winds that wish to blow you off course. Know who you are, and take comfort in that knowledge, because any person who would take action that seems contrary to your identity does so out of ignorance or fear. I do hope this has been helpful to some of you. Comment, respond, do all those internet things people love to do, but leave some feedback (because I know all of you have opinions).
Until next time.
The kinder you are, the more likely you are to be stepped on.
Now, that doesn't mean I advocate being an asshole. In fact, it's quite the opposite. While that statement is certainly true, the fact of the matter is that those people are often abused so that the offending party can give themselves a quick leg-up in a situation. In the long term, karmically, those kinder people will often grow into stronger individuals, and be led to more successful paths in their lives.
What does this mean to you? First is the fact that yes, you should be a 'nice' person, but in doing so you are guaranteed to open yourself up to hardships and pain that you otherwise would not experience. The other side of that coin, however, is that in so doing, you will reach heights that you would otherwise not. Second, you must not begrudge those people who do harm you on your path. It is rarely your place to deliver recompense for wrongdoing against you, and the most fruitful course of action to take is to allow it as little power of influence over your life as possible. Sure, at some points, you are going to be hurt by people you genuinely care about; but, don't allow that to cloud your vision as to the true nature of your behavior. Your identity, and more importantly the essence that formed that identity, is not a thing that you should allow to shift with the tides of your environment. You can choose to be malleable, true, and at certain stages of your life change will indeed be necessary, but the key is to make it deliberate change that you've decided will be for the betterment of your life. Don't indulge vengeful thoughts, especially against those people you would have at one time called most dear to your heart; because if you do, you are validating their behavior toward you. If you instead continue on the path you've chosen to be your personal truth, and disallow those outside influences to affect your pace on said course, then the burden of guilt falls on your attacker.
Finally, to address the actual title of the article. Kind people most often tend to take it upon themselves to sacrifice something of their own for other peoples happiness. The alternative would be for both parties to reach a compromise on whatever the issue may be. The reason this happens is due to the imbalance of effort in these interpersonal relations. The typical development will end up with one party trying to hold up a relationship on their own, while the scale tips and the opposing party reaps all the immediate rewards of the first's benevolence. This chain of events inevitably leads to the aforementioned abuse, but now we can see why the kinder party emerges ahead. While that effort, within the context of that singular relationship, can often seem for naught; on the whole, when one considers personal development, it builds them to allow even greater effort to be put forth in more egalitarian environments. If those people do indeed not allow themselves to be set off course by those transpired events that seem at first to be failures, they will continue on with more fervent pace, and a certain heart.
Be strong in your actions, resolute in your decisions, and stoic against those winds that wish to blow you off course. Know who you are, and take comfort in that knowledge, because any person who would take action that seems contrary to your identity does so out of ignorance or fear. I do hope this has been helpful to some of you. Comment, respond, do all those internet things people love to do, but leave some feedback (because I know all of you have opinions).
Until next time.
Dissemination of thoughts, and other such things.
For quite some time, I've been the sort of man whose ideas tend to stray away from the status quo. While I do not claim complete uniquity (and goodness, I would certainly HOPE I'm not alone) perhaps it's possible that what I have to say would be helpful to potential readers, and that maybe the experiences I've gained in my short life would be of use to someone who may be stuck somewhere on their journey.
Now that we've established the purpose of my writing, it might be best to give a cursory overview of what I feel I can offer here. Foremost, I am a musician. I feel music is the purest and most truthful expression of the soul, and it handles communication with far more grace than even I can muster with my command of the oft-clumsy word. I am a teacher, insomuch as what knowledge and wisdom I accrue on my path, I then turn and share with others. That may be my most potent contribution to society. I am also a student, as far as the literal definition goes. I am still in school, yes, but at this point the capacity to develop from life experiences has been gained, and all further instruction is just expedited advancement on roads I already tread. I am a composer of both the note and the written word, and that may be the chief reason for the existence of this page. I've dabbled in a great deal as far as the creation and assemblage of those things are concerned, and I've turned out a few moderate successes thus far. I am a Jew, of the messianic variety, which in layman's terms tends to put me closer to the protestant faith than the Jewish orthodoxy. I am an American, and seeing as my country is thusly divided at the moment, I must further clarify and include my Conservatism.
Utmost, however, among the myriad things I may be labeled; I am a man. A man who stands by virtue when the flow of morality shifts and those like myself are left to brave the current. I am a man who loves dearly, and thinks deeply, and who strives to appreciate those things the world has left behind. I am a man with scars, because when one lives their life with an open heart, cruel things slip in. Sometimes they do so under the guise of respect and understanding, before shedding their cloak and revealing themselves. Nevertheless, pain considered, I would choose this path over that of cold, unrelenting apathy. I am simultaneously an optimist and a cynic, dependent on the subject at hand. I can discuss any topic with any person, so long as they have an open mind. I stand my ground on those things that compose my being, and have found a place of righteousness within me. I struggle, as any person does in this harsh yet beautiful world, and living life day to day sometimes is a burden of undue difficulty. Most importantly, I must say, even though I have laid out before you all of these things I believe I am, the true determination of my character in your mind lies on your shoulders. Form your opinions, question me, test me, befriend me, navigate away from the page as if this is no more than over-inflated rhetoric, but follow your heart.
There's a cliche to start off what will hopefully become a vibrant literary adventure, follow your heart as I will follow mine. I have no notoriety, I am no different than you, but you can trust me to always give an honest opinion, and friendly advice. Visit me from time to time, perhaps as this develops I may say something that is of use to you. Feel free to subscribe, share me with your friends, send me letters of hate or admiration, send me questions, tell me about your day, whatever you need. This is my niche, and I welcome all of you to it. Take care of yourselves, and act out of love.
Until next time.
Now that we've established the purpose of my writing, it might be best to give a cursory overview of what I feel I can offer here. Foremost, I am a musician. I feel music is the purest and most truthful expression of the soul, and it handles communication with far more grace than even I can muster with my command of the oft-clumsy word. I am a teacher, insomuch as what knowledge and wisdom I accrue on my path, I then turn and share with others. That may be my most potent contribution to society. I am also a student, as far as the literal definition goes. I am still in school, yes, but at this point the capacity to develop from life experiences has been gained, and all further instruction is just expedited advancement on roads I already tread. I am a composer of both the note and the written word, and that may be the chief reason for the existence of this page. I've dabbled in a great deal as far as the creation and assemblage of those things are concerned, and I've turned out a few moderate successes thus far. I am a Jew, of the messianic variety, which in layman's terms tends to put me closer to the protestant faith than the Jewish orthodoxy. I am an American, and seeing as my country is thusly divided at the moment, I must further clarify and include my Conservatism.
Utmost, however, among the myriad things I may be labeled; I am a man. A man who stands by virtue when the flow of morality shifts and those like myself are left to brave the current. I am a man who loves dearly, and thinks deeply, and who strives to appreciate those things the world has left behind. I am a man with scars, because when one lives their life with an open heart, cruel things slip in. Sometimes they do so under the guise of respect and understanding, before shedding their cloak and revealing themselves. Nevertheless, pain considered, I would choose this path over that of cold, unrelenting apathy. I am simultaneously an optimist and a cynic, dependent on the subject at hand. I can discuss any topic with any person, so long as they have an open mind. I stand my ground on those things that compose my being, and have found a place of righteousness within me. I struggle, as any person does in this harsh yet beautiful world, and living life day to day sometimes is a burden of undue difficulty. Most importantly, I must say, even though I have laid out before you all of these things I believe I am, the true determination of my character in your mind lies on your shoulders. Form your opinions, question me, test me, befriend me, navigate away from the page as if this is no more than over-inflated rhetoric, but follow your heart.
There's a cliche to start off what will hopefully become a vibrant literary adventure, follow your heart as I will follow mine. I have no notoriety, I am no different than you, but you can trust me to always give an honest opinion, and friendly advice. Visit me from time to time, perhaps as this develops I may say something that is of use to you. Feel free to subscribe, share me with your friends, send me letters of hate or admiration, send me questions, tell me about your day, whatever you need. This is my niche, and I welcome all of you to it. Take care of yourselves, and act out of love.
Until next time.
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